Pavement, “Carrot Rope” (1999)

Pavement’s final song.

“Carrot Rope” was rather odd, even by Pavement-standards. The closing song on Pavement’s final album, Terror Twilight, seems to be an ode to the penis, and, on a cursory listen, it seems to be about making sexual advances to a child. This begs the question:  Why? Why on Earth would you want to go out on such an uncomfortable image?

Do Pavement lyrics need to make sense? Let’s break it down, shall we?

Lyrics

SPIRAL: I want to say
SM: It’s my second hand wonder
A thing that recovers the doubt
SPIRAL: Slim door
MARK: Like a rainstorm, you’ve got to do
What you want and say it

This overlapping chaos always thrills me. Two (or more) singers fighting for attention. It has the air of a Spiral Stairs song that Stephen Malkmus couldn’t help but comment on. For the track to have three lead singers seems destined for disaster, but somehow, the melodies sing. It’s a fascinating mess.

“It’s my second hand wonder, a thing that recovers the doubt.”

Malkmus seems to jump in, out of only curiosity. “I don’t mean to bump into your song, but maybe I can elevate this in some way. ‘Cause I’m not really sure about this. Is it too simple maybe?”

Then Mark chimes in: “This seems like a rainstorm, melodically.” If something sounds like a good idea, why not throw it onto the pile? The song seems alive. One line in, I find myself wondering — are all of the lyrics going to be this dense?

SM: It’s of my design assembled at the cut
SPIRAL: Slim door
SM: It’s all right to shake, to fight, to feel
MARK: You go down, down, down, down

The tug of war goes on. Malkmus asserts his role as the track’s architect, insisting that this tangled web of ideas is his design. The song is stitched together “at the cut” — a phrase that could evoke film or audio tape editing.

The band takes turns adding cool sounds. Spiral shuts a door, Mark takes steps down, and Malkmus proclaims that what moves you can’t be bad. That’s Malkmus’s entire lyrical philosophy in a nutshell.

SM: Harness your hopes to the folks
With the liquor with the ropes
Red, red ropes, periscopes
They’ve got everything you will ever need
Stored under the chair

Was this a callback to “Harness Your Hopes” — an outtake from Brighten the Corners? When “Carrot Rope” came out, most listeners wouldn’t have even heard that B-side. Maybe the phrase lingered in Malkmus’s head, a leftover on the cutting room floor.

A harness controls and restrains. Maybe he’s saying, “We’re all trying to make something great here, but we have to keep it contained.” Or maybe “the folks with the liquor and the ropes” are the fans, the ones who decide what a song ultimately means.

And “stored under the chair”? It could be either forgotten ideas or just literal junk. We decide, I guess. I personally stash things under my patio furniture. Maybe that’s what he’s talking about — those weird little details we all carry.

Simmer, simmer, simmer down
Simmer, simmer, simmer down
Don’t waste your precious breath
Explaining that you are worthwhile

The music slows, as if trying to soothe us. And the message? You are worthwhile. But why waste time explaining it to somebody else? Seeking validation from others is futile.

Simmer, simmer, simmer down
Simmer, simmer, simmer down
Be patient and I’ll let you see my
Carrot rope, feed my thrill
I got beat by weather

Calm down, and I’ll let you see my penis. But don’t worry — it’s flaccid. Rock stars have a long history of singing about their genitalia, but Pavement makes it sound so incredibly… ordinary.

Then there’s the wicket keeper — a cricket term. The wicket keeper stands behind the stumps, ready to catch the ball. If the keeper is down, the game is compromised and no one can win. The sustained minor chord that ends the section is pure “Game over, man.”

SM: Hey little boy, would you like to know
What’s in my pocket or not
It’s no ploy, it’s no gimmick
It’s the chance of a lifetime to see
Something that’s never seen by mere mortals

SPIRAL: Except me
MARK: And myself

And now the song spirals into overt creep territory. Malkmus adopts the voice of a pervert, though what he offers to show the boy is… his carrot rope. It’s an absurdly non-sexual euphemism. “Hey, want to see what a grown man’s penis looks like?” Ok. Unsettling. But maybe not dangerously so?

Spiral and Mark chime in as if additional voices in Stephen’s head. “No one has ever seen my penis, but me and only me.” It’s like something out of The Jerk — “And that’s all I need. And that’s ALL I need.” The song becomes a parody of rock-star bravado.

A little, little Christian lie
A little, little Christian lie
Debating if it’s time
To drop the bomb on you, my dear

But what if this isn’t just parody? What if the song masks something deeper? The “Christian lie” could point to internalized homophobia — the struggle of someone trying to suppress their desires. He might be married, fighting to maintain a facade.

A little, little Christian lie
A little, little Christian lie
Let’s get down to brass tacks and start it

And now, we strip away the nonsense. “Brass tacks” means getting to the essentials. Maybe the song’s narrator is finally done pretending. He’s ready to confront what’s real. If this is a man with internalized homophobia, maybe this transition considers it is time to explore his sexuality in a healthy way (around other adults).

It’s time to get me off of the ground
The wicket keeper is down
The wicket keeper is down
And he gets me off of the ground

And just like that, we’re back to cricket. The image shifts.  “The wicket keeper is down”, but he is just helping someone get off the field. My guess is he probably isn’t coming back. This was nice, but it was probably time. “Fun while it lasted.”

The idea of helping each other, even at the expense of winning, is a strangely sweet sentiment for Pavement’s career closer.

Final Thoughts

Looking at the lyrics as a whole, the song’s vocal interplay feels like a deliberate comment on the “let’s just say it because it sounds cool” tradition. Pavement, ever meta, critiques on what is happening.

After years of making music through compromise and collaboration, Malkmus was likely rgo on his own. “Carrot Rope” feels like him wrestling with that — knowing it’s time to step away but still tangled in the joy and frustration of the band dynamic.

And after all that? I’m left with this: this is my third favorite Pavement song.*

Lyrical content: A
Rating: 5/5

*Not that it matters, but number one and two are “Cut Your Hair” and “Harness Your Hopes.